‘Blu-ray or Bust’ - THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN

‘Blu-ray or Bust’

THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN (2016, R, 112 minutes, DREAMWORKS)

Guys are testosterone infused ass-hats.

Honestly, that is the biggest lesson I learned from THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN. While it is an engaging tale about a divorcee who suspects something sinister is afoot when a girl she sees every day on her daily commute goes missing. There are really no nice guys in this film, and every female character cries. Seriously. Like, at one point, it seems like the water shortage in California is a myth—JUST GET ALL THE ACTRESSES TO CRY INTO THE AQUAFIER, YOU’LL BE FINE.

This mystery has the classic elements of a well-told Hitchcockian tale, although a few of the misfires (see: all the freaking crying) threaten to derail the film. The acting is superb; as “Rachel”, Emily Blunt gives a performance that all actresses hoping to play a heartbroken alcoholic should study. Equally as effective is Haley Bennett as the “Gone Girl” Megan, a woman whose fractured past has driven her to the brink of chaotic behavior. Then you have Rebecca Ferguson, who breathes life into the role of “Anna”, Rachel’s ex-husband’s new wife. There isn’t a weak female performance in the film, and these three women, whose lives intertwine in the most extreme and violent of ways, are the emotional force of this story.

And then there are the dudes. Total douche-canoes.

To say more may give too much away when it comes to the mystery of this film. Story wise, it plays out in the only way the book could allow. While the style is reminiscent of GONE GIRL, the director, Tate Taylor, ain’t no David Fincher. While each woman’s story is a different story of survival, he tells their tales in the same manner. One of the most effective moves Fincher made with GONE GIRL was totally changing up the style of storytelling when the story changed focus.

The special features give focus to the adaptation of the source material (the best-selling novel by Paula Hawkins), and the three female leads. There are also a smorgasbord of deleted and extended scenes, but most are throwaways, and not entirely worth the effort.

The movie is not all bad; again, the performances are fantastic, and the story itself may keep you guessing (re-read that last bit, only yell the word “may” in your brain) (or out loud—people might think you’ve lost your aunt, or are pining for spring, which could be amusing either way).   Yet there were several times while watching that I felt I was being spoon-fed stereotypes. I don’t want to be condescended to, or reminded that GIRLS CRY, but I do want to be engaged with what I’m watching.

And, I also want to be engaged to Haley Bennett…

Film Grade: B-

Special Features: B-

Blu-ray Necessary: Not necessarily